In light of last week’s suicide of 2 celebrities, Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, my heart grieves for the families and friends left behind. I fear for others who may be on the brink of suicide and am compelled to write this letter. I want to offer those in darkness real hope in a real God who wants to help you fight your demons and bring you out of darkness forever. Because He has done it for me, he will do it for you too.
If you only knew how much you’re worth and how well your life will turn out, you won’t want to kill yourself.
Life won’t always be this hard. You won’t always hurt this much. The pain will go away. In time.
You are so lonely, I know. But it’s because you’ve isolated yourself from everyone. You’re keeping too many secrets for fear no one will understand. Reach out to the people in your path and tell them why you hurt. Don’t be afraid to let them know who you really are and what you need. They can help you if you let them.
You don’t have to cry yourself to sleep every night in the dark! Shut that depressing music off! It is putting wrong thoughts in your mind and dragging you low. You are loved! Your life does matter! People do care about you! They do want you to live!
So you think taking your life will make people feel sorry for how they’ve treated you? Even if you are correct, would this matter if you are dead? You won’t be around to see their remorse or receive their apologies. This is idiotic thinking!
How you feel about yourself may be real, but your view of yourself is skewed. You do not have a right and true perspective of yourself because you’ve been tainted by wounds aimed to tear you down to shreds. You have an enemy who wants to destroy you because he hates the One who made you. And, he has a cast of demons with him to help with his cause.
Yes, dear heart. Demons are real. For your struggle is not against yourself and others, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against the mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. You don’t know this yet, but God wrote these words in Ephesians 6, chapter 12 of the Bible specifically for you. These demons are your enemies. They lie to you about yourself, your world, your life, and the people around you. They want you to loathe yourself and feel hopeless so you’d end your life. Then, they’d defeat you and your Maker.
That was the bad news. But, there is much good news for you to hear.
Dear heart, darkness is not your end because God has sent light into the world. And this light shines in the darkness. And the darkness cannot extinguish the light.
Beloved, God loved you so much that he sent his one and only Jesus into the world to extinguish your darkness. You will come to believe in Him and his light will penetrate through the darkness, which has clouded your vision and outlook. You will understand why you went through the valley of the shadow of death.
Years down the road, you will see how the light brought you out of darkness so you can offer hope and help pull people out of darkness by pointing them to this same light that rescued you from your dungeon. You will learn to love yourself because you’ll understand how your Maker made you just as you are on purpose and for a purpose. You’ll stop hating the person looking back at you in the mirror. You’ll value her and even thank God for the darkness you went through, because He will constantly remind you how he carried you through the darkness so you can help point those in darkness to Him
So, hang in there dear heart. You are not the ugly, useless, loathsome, and unworthy person you believe you are. Light is coming into your darkness sooner than you know. No longer will you be a self-hater. For your Creator, God made you in his image. Because he is love, he will show you how to love yourself and keep you living in his light, away from the darkness, once you give your heart to him.
Dear suicidal self, you are God’s treasure. Your life matters. You have much to offer because God put much worth in you. Don’t give up. Keep hoping. Keep praying. Don’t take your life. Give your life to Him. He will do more with it than you can ever hope for and he will fill your heart with so much love, passion, and satisfaction that you won’t ever go back into the darkness again!
With deep love,
Your Redeemed Self 🙂